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Things an ABAer Would Never Say


The playing area at Nationals is always at the right temperature - never too hot or too cold.



Free coffee? No thanks.


Cool! A four board sit-out.


No. I don't think tournament fees are too high.


I can always count on my partner to remember every convention on our card.


No gossip, please. I'm not interested.


Great. More new alerts! More new alerts!


One thing I can say about bridge players - they sure know how to dress.


No matter which direction we sit, the cards always go our way.


I don't feel like bridge today. I'd rather jog and work out.

Sure, I'll take care of my own garbage.